The newsletter is not filled with facts. It is filled with truth. There is no such book as the Martyr Suffering League Manual. Even so, the manual does exist. It is an unwritten, often unspoken set of beliefs that keeps our egos jumping and our guilt intact. Even though the Martyr Suffering League is not existent, but the nonexistent organization has members. The EZosophy Manual is another nonentity, but when you read the would-be text mentioned below, watch it strike a chord. Don't take this seriously. Take it lightly. It is a humorous attempt to peg the ego and its drama.

Is your life as easy as you want it to be? Do you have more pain and suffering (P & S) than necessary? Is P & S expendable? Is all P & S necessary? Is any part of P & S optional? For the answer to this and other questions concerning P & S, consult that Martyr Suffering League Manual (MSLM). The MSLM has unequivocally stated that all P & S is necessary. The Martyr Suffering League (MSL) campaign slogan -- "no pain, no gain" -- is gathering momentum. MSL members deify suffering. They constantly crusade for members. They hold their best meetings on Sunday mornings. The MSLM contains the following chapters:

Chapter 1        "Shame and Blame for All: The Easy Way to Stomp out Innocence."

Chapter 2          "Practical Suffering for the Inner 2-Year-Old."

Chapter 3       " I Was a Pain in All Seasons. "

Chapter 4        "Spontaneous P & S for the Elderly."

Chapter 5        "P & S for All Holidays, with a Special Section on Christmas and Easter."

Chapter 6        "Creative Suffering for All Ages"

Chapter 7        "Body Tales: From Rocking to Rotting."

Chapter 8         "Where Should You Draw the Line When You Whine?"

There are over 70 chapters in the manual. Every copy I see is well worn and dog‑eared. I question the wisdom of the whole MSL movement and their championed slogan.

EZosophists know that much of our P & S is optional. The EZosophist Movement is actually a growing grass roots movement that counters the insatiable need that the MSL members have to suffer and promote P & S. The MSL has been very successful. Many of its leaders do not know that they are members. P & S are "cunning and baffling." People, who think of themselves as positive, live in deep denial. P & S is found in the young, old, rich and poor. Unless the disease of P & S goes into recovery, its victims' lives end in death or insanity. We live in a culture that values unnecessary P & S. I call unnecessary suffering Ego Driven Suffering (EDS). EDS is a set of behaviors we learn as kids from our families. The school, the work place and our religious institutions reinforce the beliefs and behaviors of the Hardaholic. The following are a set of behaviors taken from the EZosophist Manual (EZM) which identify EDS:

1.      Washing Suffering includes dreading to do and complaining about washing the

a) windows b) clothes c) floors d) kids e) dog f) boat bottom g) swimming pool walls.

2.      Cleaning Suffering includes dreading to do and complaining about cleaning the

a) closet b) desk at the office c) inside of house including vacuuming, making up beds, dusting d) fish tanks e) storage room f) under the lawn mower.

3.      IRS Tax Preparation Suffering and Panic.

4.      Shopping Suffering includes suffering and mental cruelty around shopping for

a) major appliances b) groceries c) cell phones and minute packages d) wedding, Christmas, birthday, anniversary presents.

5.      Letter Suffering includes suffering and hardship about writing

a) business letters b) thank you letters c) complaint letters d) seasonal cards.

6.      Maintenance Suffering is suffering about doing things that must be done to keep things working. We include freaking out about

a) routine annual check up (dentist or doctor) b) changing car oil c) mowing grass or suffering about hiring someone to mow the grass (I should do it myself to save money or I need the exercise) d) backing up hard disk e) weeding the flower bed.

1. Cut out complaining. It's okay to share honest emotions, but suffering about doing things is not emotional honesty.

2. Do not spend your conversations reciting your "to do" list.

3. Just do it now. Instead of putting it off, just jump in and do it now.

4. If you can't do all of it now, do part of it now. Celebrate your progress, and do the rest later. Do not beat up on yourself for not completing the task.

5. If you put off doing something, just put it off. Do not "get" yourself if you don't do it. Don't suffer and feel guilty about not doing what you are not doing.

6. Don't mentally create your future then ruin the present by suffering about the projection. Live "one day at a time."